Father’s Day is such an interesting holiday in that it brings up “father issues’” for a lot of people.

I’ve been really blessed in my life. My adoptive father was wonderful to me, and my husband was a great dad to our kids.

But not everyone is so lucky. There is a paradigm in our society that seems to allow men the freedom to choose whether or not they want to be responsible to their children. Sometimes they don’t want to, sometimes they don’t know how to.

What many men don’t realize is the power they have to shape their children’s future, simply by being present.

Clearly, as a woman, I don’t know how to be a father. But, I have observed some things that make sense.

Fathers can teach their children how to be, and how to love. Fathers teach their kids whether they intend to or not, either by their presence or in their absence. Children who have appropriate relationships with their fathers seem more likely to make positive choices in their own adult relationships and careers.

I think sometimes young men shy away from actively participating in their children’s lives because their fathers weren’t active in their lives, so they don’t know what to do with their own kids.

Really, it’s easy to be a good dad. You just have to be there.

Here are three ways to be a great dad.

1. Play with your kids. Play with the toys they want to play with, not the toys you prefer. Many young fathers can dress a Little Pony in two seconds flat. Be that guy.

2. Don’t get caught up in gender roles. Take your daughter fishing. Have a tea party with your son. Teach your kids, by your example, that their interests don’t need to be limited by their gender.

3. Share your interests with your kids. Teach them your skills, share your hobbies and involve them in your life. Your kids want to know you, and through knowing you, will find their own sense of identity.

Being present, sharing interests and showing them their potential without false limitations with give your kids a great start. You’ll have fun, too. And you will rarely be as important to any other person as you are to your children.