Spiritual Bypassing at the Tarot Table

Over the past few months I have found myself thinking about spiritual bypassing more and more. I wasn’t sure why this concept was floating into my field of attention so strongly until I started doing a little research. In an article in Psychology Today I found a list of signs that a person is engaged in spiritual bypassing. The list included an item that drew my attention, ‘engaging in cognitive dissonance’.

Watching people around me embrace obvious conspiracy theories, and watching others give spiritual explanations for their world views which, to me, logically don’t add up, I see an alarming trend.

Spiritual bypassing is something that most people will do at certain points in their lives, and it is not always harmful. Sometimes it is a necessary part of healing and growth. It is only when spiritual bypassing becomes the ongoing default behavior that it becomes potentially problematic.

Spiritual bypassing is a natural reaction to trauma. Right now, most of our nations and all of our planet seems to be suffering from deep trauma. This trauma is caused by a confluence of things, a perfect storm, if you will. We have pandemic, social media, economic turmoil, and the rise of fundamentalism in both Islam and Christianity which is directly in conflict with the rising demand for equality for all.

It occurs to me that, just as individuals may engage in spiritual bypassing as a response to personal trauma, societies will engage in spiritual bypassing as a result of national trauma, and global trauma.

‘Spiritual bypassing’ is a term that was first coined by a prominent Buddhist psychotherapist and author named John Welwood in the 1980s. It’s a term I have become aware of relatively recently, but a phenomenon I have noticed all of my life. It’s good to have a solid term to use to describe a disturbing but hard-to-nail-down series of human behaviors.

Spiritual bypassing is the cause of toxic positivity. Spiritual bypassing is at the root of dangerous philosophies such as ‘Prosperity Gospel’ and over-the-top misunderstanding of the Law of Attraction. These belief systems excuse adherents from the burden of compassion by blaming the sick for their illness, and the poor for their poverty.

In short, spiritual bypassing allows people to feel insulated from misfortune based on their spiritual beliefs and practices. Spiritual bypassing allows people to feel comfort from spiritual practices without truly acknowledging and healing their wounds. Spiritual bypassing serves as an escape from the actual work of healing, and from the actual truth of vulnerability.

Tarotists can be doubly at risk for the effects of spiritual bypassing because we ourselves can fall victim to it, and we can see it in our clients at the tarot table.

Just as religious fundamentalists are inherently involved in spiritual bypassing, so are tarot fundamentalists. Tarot fundamentalists are those who cannot question what they think they saw in the cards, or what they think they were told in a reading.

We tarotists can fall prey to spiritual bypassing when the cards tell us everything will be okay, and so we neglect to do the mundane work we need to do to make everything okay.

Amongst we tarot readers are those who do a lot of predictive reading, and those who don’t. I am a predictive reader. Yet, I am clear in my own mind, and clear to tell my clients, that the future is never written in stone, and that what we do today matters a great deal in what happens tomorrow. When we forget that fact, we give up our power in life, and begin to engage in spiritual bypassing,

I believe that tarot, and that all spiritual practice, is meant to empower us to heal, to help others, and to live well upon the planet. I also know that to do those things is hard work. Our spiritual practice, whatever it may be, must encourage that work, rather than excuse us from it.

In these difficult times, now more than ever, we must be aware of the human tendency to use spirituality as an escape from reality, and an avoidance of truth. Surrounding ourselves with spiritual thought and activity is only helpful if it encourages us to do the work we need to do, and to accept the ultimate truth that we are all at risk for sudden misfortune.

When we see our clients and friends engaged in spiritual bypassing, we need to assess their readiness to be gently prodded toward a more productive healing path. As tarot readers we often have to walk the delicate balance of meeting people where they are without corroborating their unhelpful beliefs.

In this time of great and overwhelming trauma and cognitive dissonance we have a responsibility to use our tools to keep our grounding, and to help others do the same. The Four Elements which figure so prominently in tarot are a helpful reminder, and a helpful tool, in doing that.

The element of Air reminds us to seek the logical truth and avoid that which masquerades as truth.

The element of Fire reminds us to stay active and motivated in the pursuit of our goals, rather than waiting for good things to simply happen to us.

The element of Water reminds us to stay in a place of compassion, and to hold space for our own grief, and the grief of others.

The element of Earth reminds us to stay grounded, proactive, and practical in our thoughts and actions.

Overcoming Shyness and Other Obstacles as a Tarot Reader

Overcoming Shyness and Other Obstacles as a Tarot Reader

I received a question from a budding professional tarot reader who is struggling with shyness. She noticed that I had spoken about my own struggles early in my career, and how I overcame them with tarot. She wanted to know how I had done that, and my advice for her. This is something I think a lot of tarotists contend with. The traits that make us mystical often also make us a bit introverted.

I think one of the best ways to create personal change with tarot is to work with Court Card Significators.

The first thing you need to do is find what I call your Native Court Card Significator Do this based on your age, gender identity and sun sign astrology. For example, I am a cisgender adult woman born under the sun sign of Scorpio. Therefore, I am the Queen of Cups, because Scorpio is a water sign.

Now, look at your Court Card Significator and decide the ways in which this card’s attributes help you to be a good tarot reader, and the ways in which they might create obstacles.

If the obstacles outweigh the positive aspects, choose another card, either a Court card or not, to be your Tarot Reader Significator.

Claim this as the card of your tarot reader persona. Meditate with it, sleep with it, print it out and carry it with you. Eventually, this card will start showing up in your self-readings to let you know you are on the right track.

You can also do some great one-card divination exercises to help you access your best skills as a tarot reader. Ask questions like, what should my focus be right now? Or, which card best describes the energy I need to embrace in my tarot practice right now.

By using these techniques, you will harness the power of tarot magick and tarot divination to help you become the best reader you can be.

Watch the video for more information. If you have a question about tarot, please email me.

Why Your New Tarot Business Might Fail (And How to Make It Work)

Why Your New Tarot Business Might Fail

(And How to Make It Work)

As my friend Jenna Matlin says, tarot is having a moment. Psychism, of course, has been popular throughout history. There have always been seers, oracles and diviners. I often joke that if prostitution was the first profession, psychic reading was the second. (Although my midwife friends insist that the second profession was midwifery.)

Tarot, and cartomancy in general, are newer tools of the psychic trade. Long before we had cardboard and printing presses, we had stones, beans and bones. Perhaps tarot’s current popularity is borne simply of its modern accessibility.

Whatever the reason, I am thrilled that there are now more tarot decks, tarot classes, tarot groups and tarot readers than ever before in history. Yet, there is another trend that I see that is a bit more concerning. That is the trend of enthusiastic new tarot professionals leaving the industry as quickly as they came in.

Jenna and I discussed this in our last informal Tarot Biz Chat. Her take is that pro tarot readers can burn out quickly, and that many new tarotists don’t know how to protect themselves from burnout.

She has a point. I have seen burned out readers retire with drama and fanfare, although usually after several decades of successful practice, not several months or years.

Job burnout is a risk in any profession, of course. It’s also statistically true that any new business, in the first five years, has an equal chance of failure or success.

I believe there are a multitude of reasons talented new tarot pros often quickly throw in the towel, and some of those reasons don’t include burnout. Here are some of the problems I have seen in the ventures of my students and colleagues over the past twenty-five years, along with some advice on what to do differently.

You Started Pro Reading Before You Were Ready

This is an easy trap. Tarot teachers and business coaches will encourage you to be brave and get out there without evaluating whether you are truly ready. Psychic fair operators will push to get your butt in a chair as quickly as possible because they are under-staffed.

It might be that you felt encouraged because you did a few practice readings that went really well. Perhaps you had an immediate financial problem and felt tarot could be a source of much-needed revenue.

The solution here isn’t to quit, but to back off and brush up. Sometimes a tarot reading flows smoothly. All the cards make sense in their positions and appear to answer questions succinctly and definitively. It’s those readings that fool us into believing tarot reading is easy. When the cards don’t make sense at first, or the client communicates in a challenging way, we need to rely on our studied knowledge and the experience we gained from countless hours of practice.

You Aren’t Practicing Good Psychic Hygiene

This is where I think Jenna’s theory about burnout really applies. If you feel drained after a reading, or if you are having a hard time receiving intuition on demand, or if there are days you just don’t feel like doing a reading, it’s possible you aren’t doing the energy work that is necessary for professional tarot.

The trick to fix this is fairly simple. Make sure you do strong energy work to create sacred space for each reading. Connect yourself to both earth and heaven, and become a straw, or a conduit, for energy.

Give nothing of yourself to your client and take no energy from them. Serve them with the limitless supply of energy that you pull, as a conduit, from earth and heaven.

After the reading, shake your energy off, and consciously release your client.

You should emerge from a long day of readings feeling energized, not drained. If that is not what is happening, meditate, breathe, work with your energy and be a better straw.

You Aren’t Attracting Enough Business

Very often when I hear this complaint it is followed by a list of reasons excuses explaining why it just isn’t possible to gain new clients. Those excuses often include geography. That is, the belief that people where you live just aren’t into tarot, or don’t like getting readings, or believe that this stuff is evil.

I will be the first to tell you that every geographic area is different, and some are easier to work than others. However, the difference is not that people in some areas enjoy what we do and people in other areas don’t. The difference is that in some areas, people are more closeted about it, and therefore you have to work harder to identify and serve them.

On the flip side, if you are in a mystic-friendly location, you might feel the market is choked and there is no room for you. That’s an excuse, too. If you are a good reader, there will always be people who want to see you.

Another reason readers don’t attract business is they don’t present themselves with confidence. Clients will only be as confident in you as you are in yourself.

Another problem is you might be marketing to the wrong demographic. It’s amazing how often I see tarot readers marketing to other tarot readers. While we do sometimes read for each other, your tarot friends and students will not always be your best source of clients. The vast majority of your clients will be people who want answers and insight and don’t give two pents about tarot, metaphysics, spirituality or how you derive your information.

Your Goals Aren’t Clear, or Your Expectations Aren’t Realistic

Perhaps you attended a tarot party and watched a mediocre reader make a thousand dollars in an evening. Perhaps you believed a shyster tarot business coach when they told you that it’s easy to make a six-figure income with tarot. Perhaps you believe that memorizing seventy-eight key words is all it takes to give a meaningful tarot reading.

I have met many aspiring tarot pros with unrealistic expectations of both the earning potential of a tarot reader and the ease with which they could do the work and make the money.

Legitimate tarot reading can be moderately lucrative, but only if you are patient and work hard. If your goal is to make a lot of money, there are hundreds of better jobs to choose.

It’s important to be clear about your goals. Professional tarot offers so many different types of opportunities. You can entertain at parties, work on the phone or webcam, work in shops and psychic fairs, or find your own venues. A college student can often make more money and have more fun working psychic fairs than hustling fast food. You can read tarot as a side hustle or a full-time job. Just be sure about where and how you want your tarot business to fit in your life, now and in the future. Don’t expect a full-time income from a part-time effort, and don’t expect a full-time income when you first start out.

Most importantly, only choose to be a tarot professional if you love reading for strangers. You may love tarot and may enjoy tarot books, classes, art and friends. That’s a beautiful thing. Perhaps the best, most important use of divinatory tarot is for one’s own enjoyment and enlightenment. None of that, however, means that you will be delighted to have your job be reading tarot for clients. But, if reading for others does delight you, I promise there is no greater joy than having that be your livelihood.

If you are interested in taking the next step in growing your business, make sure you get a copy of my book, Fortune Stellar.

If you would like to work one-on-one with me to grow your skills and business, contact me about a custom mentorship program.

I hope you can catch Jenna Matlin and me as we present our Professional Development Day as an extension of the Northwest Tarot Symposium.