What Might Have Been

My mother often recited a verse in response to expressions of regret about the past.

For of all sad words of tongue or pen,

The saddest are these: 'It might have been!’

I hear her voice in my head saying these words at the tarot table when helping clients process their past regrets. I never say these words aloud to my clients. That would not be any more helpful to them than it was to me all those years ago.

What fascinates me is how often our regrets are intensified by the firm belief that if one thing had been different, some other important thing would have turned out so much better.

The movie The Butterfly Effect handily refutes the notion that a single different choice would always create a better outcome.

We can use tarot to challenge our beliefs about past regrets and gain a new perspective. For example, if someone blames their in-laws for their failed marriage, a tarot reading could reveal a different truth. Hearing that new truth could allow health and closure.

A funny thing happened when I Googled the origin of this verse my mother often repeated. I was thrilled to find a delightful story along with the source.

According to Wikipedia, the verse is from a poem written in 1856 called “Maud Muller.” The poem is about two young people from different stations in life who, despite a great attraction, don’t become a couple. Instead, each endure unhappy marriages. The poem's premise is that they would have been happier if they had chosen one another.

A younger contemporary of the poet wrote a parody sequel where the couple got together and lived unhappily ever after. The closing line of this poem is witty satire.

More sad are these we daily see:

‘It is but hadn’t ought to be.’

This poem and its sequel parody perfectly illustrate how we struggle to get closure to the past because of the stories we tell ourselves. We cast ourselves as the villain rather than giving ourselves grace. We forget that we always did our best with what we had. We imagine things would be so much better if a different decision had been made.

Common sense, spiritual wisdom, and divination often combine to point the way back to obvious truths. It's impossible to know for sure what events would have followed a different decision or if that outcome would have been better than what occurred. Treating ourselves with grace and understanding, rather than shame and guilt, helps us process the past and move forward.

Perhaps the most important thing is to try to view our entire past, both good and bad, as leading us toward a brighter future. This enables us to live with acceptance rather than regret. Then we can focus on what is, and what will be, rather than what we think might have been.

The StaarCon Fairy for 2024 by Ciro Marchetti.

The StaarCorner

StaarCon 2024 is from January 19 through January 21. You can join us for one, two, or all three days. You can join us in person or online. All ticket holders can access the 365-day AfterGlow on the Accelevents platform.

When we plan to attend a conference, either in person or virtually, we think about what we will eat. If you attend online, have your favorite meals and snacks at home and log into the Tiki Bar lounge to dine with your conference friends.

If you are joining us in person, your StaarCon ticket gets you a twenty percent discount at all the hotel bars and restaurants. If you are in town Thursday night, join Mitchell Osborn for a dinner excursion to Rosemary Square in downtown West Palm Beach.

On Saturday and Sunday, you will notice that the StaarCon agenda does not include designated lunch breaks. Because we have 365 days to watch recordings of presentations and because we had so many presenters excited to join us, we have scheduled full days of presentations. If you join us online, you can take a lunch break in the lounge or eat during a presentation. If you are joining in person, you can plan your lunch breaks around the presentations that interest you most.

We are excited to bring you a full schedule of exciting presenters over the three-day conference and the 365-day AfterGlow. Get your tickets now, and plan to join us at StaarCon 2024.

Tony Roma's Restuarant at the Hilton Palm Beach Airport Hotel.
Woman about to pull cards from a tarot deck.

Processing the Past with Tarot

Many popular tarot spreads have a position for the past. For example, the three-card spread Past, Present, Future has a card that speaks to the querent’s past as its first position.

Many larger spreads have positions like recent past, foundation, unresolved issues, etc. Although we often think of divination in terms of future prediction, divination can be equally helpful in understanding the past.

Sometimes we formulate specific questions about the past. Sometimes we have questions about what really happened to which no living being has the answer. Then, tarot can help fill in the blanks and give us an idea of what happened or why something happened.

Sometimes we wonder if the decision we made was the right decision. We can use the cards to determine what might have happened in different scenarios. This often leads us to the understanding that what happened was the best thing that could have happened.

When we see a past position in a tarot spread, there are options about how to interpret the card that falls within it. Is the past five minutes ago or five years? A good rule to remember is that whatever appears in the spread will be pertinent to the current moment. That means whatever the past card references is still important or influential now.

Science is only beginning to understand the amount of trauma each person experiences and the effect that trauma has on our well-being. Tarot is a great tool to help us understand and process our past trauma so that we can nurture our best lives possible.

Close-up of tarot cards.

The Week in Review

Did you know that you can become a member of my YouTube channel? There are three levels of membership, each with perks. One perk is that each month we have a members-only livestream. This month our livestream topic is Hard Truths. We will look at ourselves, at divination, and at tarot cards with a critical and compassionate eye. If you are already a member, join us on Tuesday, August 29, at 7 pm ET, or watch the replay. If you are not yet a member, consider joining in time to catch the livestream.

When I was doing a Google search to find pertinent links to share involving tarot and looking to the past, the first item was a blogpost from 2014, written by me. Please enjoy Three Tarot Cards That Help Us Look to the Past.

From Around the Web

I found a great post from Tarot Parlor. This is a detailed and easy-to-understand how-to that will help you use tarot to learn about your past lives.

Simply Tarot offers a great nine-card Past, Present, Future tarot spread. You can learn to perform the spread or use the link to let the site perform the reading for you.

Mercury goes retrograde in Virgo this week. Here is what NYLON wants you to know about that.

Illustration of woman looking at the planets.

Creation and Divination

Storytelling is a creative, dramatic art. Interestingly, Pamela Colman Smith, the artist of the world’s most popular tarot images, was a professional storyteller.

Using tarot cards to tell stories, whether in divination or as a creative prompt, is an exercise that quickly helps us become great tarot readers.

We are all storytellers, even if we do not actively engage in creative performance or divination.

We are all storytellers because we all keep a running autobiographical narrative in our heads.

The problem is that we need to acknowledge that the way we tell our stories is a choice and a perception rather than a set of immovable facts.

Who is the villain, and who is the hero? What was the motivation? What really happened? Every day, we make choices about how we tell the stories of our past, how we understand our present, and how we see our future possibilities.

This means that we each have a god-like power to change how we perceive our past, control some of the energies around us each day, and create the future we want.

What gives us this power?

This power comes to us when we recognize that how we tell our stories influences our well-being, experiences, relationships, and success.

Upcoming Events

Christiana with Pamela Phillips.

About Christiana Gaudet

Card and Craft, Inc.
Southeastern Tarot Artists and Readers, LLC.

Christiana Gaudet

3559 SW Corporate Parkway
Palm City, Florida 34990-8152

Email cgaudet@cardandcraft.com
On the web www.christianagaudet.com
Online classes www.cardandcraftacademy.com
StaarCon information www.staarcon.com

YouTube @YourTarotFairyGodmother
Instagram @christianatarot @staarcon


Private telephone, Skype, FaceTime, Zoom and in person readings and instruction are available by appointment.

Tarot parties at your home or office are available throughout Florida.

Zoom parties and group instruction available almost everywhere!

Call toll free 866-99TAROT (866-998-2768)
Palm City 772-301-0232 x102
or call or text 561-655-1160
for more information or to schedule your event.
Schedule online at cardandcraft.10to8.com.

Agent inquiries are welcome.

Tarot Topics Newsletter
Volume 6 Issue 34
August 23, 2023

Christiana Gaudet

Christiana has been a full-time tarot professional for more than twenty years, and is the author of two books about tarot. In 2008, Christiana was granted the title of Tarot Grandmaster by the Tarot Certification Board of America. Christiana provides readings by phone, Facetime and Skype, and in her office in Palm City, Florida.

https://christianagaudet.com
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Thank Your Younger Self

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Look for the Glimmers!